I can say, this is my confession after that wild ride.
When I told you I will help you with it.
I was thinking " It's truly a waste of time trying to help him, this would make matters worse. I want to help you in anyway I could to lighten your burden, but I want to be with you fast. I am afraid of losing you. "
The evil me was having a malicious thinking.
"I need you badly and I would be happy if you were with me now."
When you said starting from the beginning.
I was thinking "Is that a rejection answer???"
When you told me everything that happened, today.
I was in tears.
I think of you more.
When you told me everything.
My evil mind drifts off..
It keep saying " If you don't do something, you will lose her."
But I told myself, it wouldn't happen.
But I am afraid.
Maybe thats the reason why I think I am rushing things up abit.
I am really really really sorry.
It's just.. my addiction for you is going very very high.
I am afraid if there is nothing to spark it off fast.
I am afraid.. I might not be myself.
My regards to you.
I think I am pushed alil too high on myself and you too.
Kill me please!
Labels: I am in pain.. =(